About Kindfulness
Kindness and Mindfulness: A Powerful Combination
Ajahn Brahm‘s teachings on metta bhavana embody the essence of kindfulness. It’s about being mindful of our kindness. Intentionally cultivating it, and recognizing its transformative power in our lives.
You know how important it is to be kind to your family, right? But what if you could be even more kind, and more mindful of that kindness at the same time?
That’s what “kindfulness” is all about.
- Kindness: Being caring and compassionate towards yourself and others. It’s about doing things that make people feel good, like giving a hug, saying “I love you,” or helping someone in need.
- Mindfulness: Paying attention to the present moment without judging. Being aware of your thoughts, feelings, and sensations without getting caught up in them.
How Kindfulness Can Help
When you combine kindness and mindfulness, you create a powerful force for good. It can help you
- Be a calmer and more patient mama. Practicing kindfulness towards yourself can help you to relax. This gives you more patience with your family. You can be more understanding when things get tough.
- Connect with your kids on a deeper level. Being kindful helps you to be more present and engaged with your kids. This creates stronger bonds through the good and the bad.
- Reduce stress and anxiety. Kindfulness towards yourself helps you feel less stressed and more at peace.
Kindfulness in Action
Kindfulness isn’t just about thinking nice thoughts. It’s about being present and aware when you’re being kind. For example:
- Notice when you’re feeling kind:. Pay attention to those moments when you feel love, compassion, or empathy for your family. Recognize how good it makes you feel.
- Be intentional with your kindness. Make a conscious effort to show kindness to your kids, even when it’s challenging.
- Be fully present when you’re being kind:. When you’re giving a hug, reading a story, or playing a game, try to be fully present and engaged.
Kindfulness is a powerful tool for us mamas.
It helps us to be more loving, compassionate, and present – creating a more peaceful and joyful life.
“Those who make compassion an essential part of their lives find the joy of life.
Kindness deepens the spirit and produces rewards that cannot be completely explained in words. It is an experience more powerful than words. To become acquainted with kindness one must be prepared to learn new things and feel new feelings.
Kindness is more than a philosophy of the mind. It is a philosophy of the spirit.”
~ Robert J. Furey
The Stress of Modern Day Lives
I’m a firm believer that we as humans struggle with the modern day lives we have created for ourselves.
With
- longer working hours,
- increased stress and pressure,
- reduced exercise and time outdoors,
- exposure to toxins and
- decline of quality nutrition in our diets,
our bodies are working much harder that they need to be.
Our modern lifestyles come at a cost to our wellbeing.
I have experienced this personally.
How Kindfulness Transformed My Life
There was a time in my life that my mind, body and soul had suffered erosion and I had felt all tanks finally reach EMPTY.
I was once a single mother with young babies, living with PND, PTSD and sleep deprivation. My health and wellbeing broke down completely. Living far away from family and friends, support came as an occasional voice on the end of the phone.
The chance for physical breaks to refuel, rest and give something back to myself were rare.
Until the day I stumbled across a concept that stopped me in my tracks – KINDFULNESS.
Enriching mindfulness with kindness to create a sense of warmth, gentleness and peace within a meditation practice.
I was certainly no yogi at the time, or any kind of meditation master. Especially with two small babies and a Tween in tow.
My best attempt at mindfulness was to try and keep my mind in the present moment while I ploughed through a large pile of washing (aka Mount Washiosko). It helped in keeping worry and anxiety at bay, but did not have me feeling relaxed or replenished in any way.
By reading the teachings of Ajahn Brahm, and using this simple concept of Kindfulness, my life began to transform.
Literally. Within minutes.
Kindfulness Practice
What I love about this ritual I’m about to share with you is this – no matter what your time management, health or even money situation is,
This is a gift you can give yourself whenever and wherever you like.
I think of it as creating sacred space for me to hang and connect with myself. To listen to my body, bring everything back to centre and rebalance.
It is a place I make room to cultivate joy, forgiveness and to exercise self-compassion.
The foundation of wellbeing begins with the balance of mind, body and spirit. Without awareness of when this balance is disturbed, dis-ease is initiated.
How can we give our bodies what they are crying out for if we can’t hear them?
Of course this isn’t the sole answer to restoring wellbeing, but it’s a darn good start!
Feel free to modify this exercise to make it your own.
Instructions
1. Find a place that is quiet and comfortable. Seated is best, with hands placed together in front of the heart. This helps you stay in your heart’s centre, rather than in your head.
2. Begin by closing your eyes and taking some slow and gentle breaths. Inhale for 3-4 seconds, then exhale through the mouth, making sure you can hear your breath on its way out.
How is your body feeling? Tight? Tense in places? Stressed? Increased heart rate?
Make sure to observe rather than begin delving into each symptom you notice.
3. Next, begin your gentle breaths at your own pace, working with your body’s natural rhythms.
Become aware of what you observe.
You can deepen this by bringing your mind to the top of your head, and gently scanning down into the face, neck, upper torso and continue on slowly until you get to the feet.
Mindfulness is about creating awareness, and acknowledging the feedback your body is giving you.
4. Now it’s time to send love, warmth and kindness to those feelings of stress and tension.
Hold those feelings tenderly as you would a newborn child or a tiny flower.
Greet them lovingly, and continue the gentle breaths while doing so.
Visualise a warm, thick, gold, melting liquid gently flowing down from the top of your head, slowly making it’s way to your feet as you scan and observe.
Gently smile while doing so to deepen the practice and your intention.
There is no time limit for this process. Take as long as you need. If your mind wanders, gently bring it back to your body
5. The home stretch… Bring your mind back to your breath.
Begin observing the new feelings you have.
The noticeable differences are often feelings of warmth, joy, fuzziness, relaxed and calm. Or perhaps you still feel a sense of anxiety and unrest, but with a little more ease this time.
This is okay too.
Notice that there may be new space around these emotions where you can tend to them on a deeper level without judgement.
The most important thing to remember is that this sacred practice is ever changing, and is the highest act of self love and compassion you can give yourself.
It is a true reconnection of your mind, body and soul.
To feel everything fully, and then nurture yourself with kindfulness is a hug for the soul and spirit.
To learn more from Olivia about kindfulness, visit her personal website or facebook page The Kindfulness Project.
